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I am in the process of taking over a family law case on behalf of a very unhappy father. He told me that his previous solicitor was not supporting his application to have joint custody of his very young son. He is a self employed man, who has organised his working week so that he can be free three days a week to look after his son. He is clearly a very dedicated, very caring, very loving father. He accepts that his wife is a caring, loving mother.

I had to admit that I thought there was more to the fall out with his previous solicitor than I was being told and when I spoke to the very experienced female family law solicitor, who had previously represented him, I was completely taken aback to hear her state that my client was being utterly unreasonable and that there was absolutely no hope that he would get the type of joint custody he was looking for.

What she said was that my client was treating his son like a commodity – 50% to you and 50% to me. She said that this child was only 5 years of age and it was clear that the mother should always have primary care and control in circumstances such as this.

I am only commenting on this because it happens so often. It particularly angers me because I have always believed a solicitor’s role to advise and support their client and not impose your own personal values on the client.

Men have a hard enough time with a legal system that is biased so much in favour of mothers without having their own lawyers adopting the same approach.

I would say this to all clients who are instructing a new solicitor. Suss them out first. Have a cup of coffee with them and find out if they are genuinely on your side and if they will genuinely support and help you through the process whether it is family law or anything else. You are paying a fee and probably a generous fee to a person, who at the very minimum, should support and help you through a particularly traumatic time of your life. The very last thing they should do is impose their own moral judgements on you. Ask your solicitor if you can talk to any of their previous clients. You would do the same if you were getting a builder to build your extension and so why not with your solicitor. Ask them if you can meet them in a less formal setting and get some idea what sort of person they are and how they will represent you.

If somebody is supposed to be on your side, make sure they really are on your side. A wolf in sheep’s clothing is a very dangerous animal.

Kevin Brophy
Brophy Solicitors